Germany's problem is German, not European. Germany also used to have waiting lists of many months for getting an extra line (+ they were expensive). Apparently, that was a Good Thing because it was because the state monopoly was protected against competition from Evil Capitalism (usually Foreign as well).
I'm not sure if you've noticed who's calling the shots in the EU. Germany's problem is the EU's problem.
I often feel like there's a fundamental misunderstanding in German politics which then spreads to EU politics. They make the same basic mistake the Soviets made: believing that people are perfectly rational, don't react to incentives, and will do what's best for everyone if given the chance. Why have competition, you'll just waste resources. If someone says they're not able to work, surely that's true, so just give them money. If we just give billions to academics, surely they'll spend it wisely and get us a first class satellite internet. If we elect someone, it's always wise to give them plenty of power so they can make their job efficiently, there's no way they'd abuse that power. If we establish a bureaucracy, surely they'll focus on being efficient and nobody will try to grow their department beyond necessary just to increase their status.
Let me try again: Germany has bad internet because Germany is German, not because the EU forces Germany to be German.
I agree with the other sentiment you express: that Germany's bad German ideas cause problems for the entire EU due to Germany's size and influence. France's bad French ideas are of the same dumb variety and they also cause problems for the entire EU due to France's size and influence.
All member states have their favourite dumb ideas. That's not much of a problem if they balance out with each other. It's a big problem when they don't.
And of course the EU would be better with less German and French influence. The EU would also be better if the UK could Brenter to counter the Big State and Big Planning ideas of not just Germany and France but also Italy, Spain, Greece, Portugal, etc. The "Frugal Four" certainly can't do it alone.
Allow competition and good things will happen.