In addition to being tone sensitive it is also very dependent on who's asking. If that person is, and that is something I hate, obviously less qualified in whatever field is concerned asks in an inquisitive tone (especially when having more hierarchical power), it's a sure way to knock any respect I had for those down a notch or two (or multiple, depending on circumstances, including my mood).
That being said, I love being challenged. Also by people new or un experienced in my field. Because it's an opportunity to learn. Either because I missed something (naive questions are really great for that), because I have to voice my thoughts and explain my thought process (and discover flaws in it), because the person asking is way better in what ever we are talking about,... you name it. Being challenged just because definitely isn't part of that.
Depends on one's connotations of the word "inquisitive." You may be associating to "general inquiry", while the GP is thinking more "the Spanish Inquisition".
The comment above mine sums it up pretty well, IMHO. There's general curiosity, a justified demand for an update and the inquisitive version indirectly implying whatever you do might be wrong. The latter, from someone with more authority, is putting you in a defensive position from the get go. It is passive aggressive. And it is borderline hubris from someone with no qualification in the subject matter at question. I especially hate the last version of it, if you don't trust me to do my job properly, why hire me in the first place? Plus, it creates a toxic culture where everyone has to justify every single one of his decisions all the time.
Well I understand now and I think your preference is entirely reasonable but I would suggest different wording in the future. The normal definition for "inquisitive" doesn't imply those things, just curiosity. Asking at all would generally be inquisitive. "inquisition-like", maybe? Or some other word, I don't know what fits best.
(And when it is curiosity, it's less offensive from someone that doesn't know much, which is part of what threw me off so badly.)
That being said, I love being challenged. Also by people new or un experienced in my field. Because it's an opportunity to learn. Either because I missed something (naive questions are really great for that), because I have to voice my thoughts and explain my thought process (and discover flaws in it), because the person asking is way better in what ever we are talking about,... you name it. Being challenged just because definitely isn't part of that.