I think there is not. You are not allowed to download the video and host it yourself, that would be a copyright violation. Am I missing a legally valid way?
Okay but let’s say you have permission to host the content — e.g: you actually own the video.
Do you still think it’s reasonable that it should be a legal requirement that to embed a video on your web page you must develop your own video delivery infrastructure?
You could just link to YouTube and not embed the video.
I think the important part is that this is an issue, only because companies like have had a surprising hard time not misusing every single bit of information sent their way. The result is that companies have forced governments to step in and now they are overregulating.
If you specify preload=yes or other take any steps whatsoever to promote preloading of the (non-GDPR) YouTube link, then you would definitely be responsible for the user’s IP leaking to a non-GDPR site, and risk owing fines under GDPR.
If you do not request preload behavior, then you’re just linking another site on the web, and users are considered to understand that links go to other sites, and that’s acceptable. A theoretical GDPR complaint would find that the user agent was responsible for the behavior, not you as site operator.
You pay for that content delivery by selling the users data to Google. Do you think that is fair that the user should pay for your video hosting with his data? If the user wants to see the video, sure, but that hasn't been made clear yet at this stage.
Well, it depends. If it's a short video that fits into your available traffic that you can just self-host with a video tag, why shouldn't you take that option? If it would be a huge burden like where you really would have to develop infrastructure despite that not being in your budget nor competence, then of course not.
I already agreed in a comment above that these questions wrongly answered by a pure privacy maximizing position carry a huge danger for the german web.
But there is. Where does it stop being reasonable? When you have to host your own video delivery infrastructure?